bluecolor.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

What has happened to me? Am I just paranoid or are things going to be this way? I'm so afraid that once all this is gotten used to, I'm out of someone's life. These relationships aren't made to work this way I know, how can I be selfish? Is it just he has so little time and I have too much? Daily calls of routine is worth only money. Is going away being cruel only to others? Do I not feel the same? So many questions. In many conversations, only some remembered. Not because of sweet words on intention, but of the simple hidden concern. I don't think I should be used to living here alone, why should I? I don't want to be used to being away from my loved ones, used to not having them, used to not needing them. Think it's still better to miss him, but I wonder what he thinks.

I wish I were a kid again,
I'd be able to say I wanna go home.

Time don't ease my pain,
and I'm afraid he'll forget.

Feels like a souvenir freshly packed,
soon to be forgotten.

My only hope for my future,
I wished had never happened.

gwen blogged at 9:43 PM

everything blue.

too much time?

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